The Mayo Saga

Last weekend I tackled the pantry. It had gotten to the point where if I opened one of the doors, I didn't know if I was going to make it out alive and with whatever foodstuff I'd been in search of in the first place. I needed a whip and a hat a la Indiana Jones. To continue the metaphor, some items were as lost as the ark. SRSLY... what IS all this stuff? I honestly can't remember the last time I made lasagna. Hell, I don't even like lasagna that much!

Here's the empty pantry.

Oh, and the chair isn't there for scale but so I can reach. (The pantry is so tall that, even with the wooden ladder, I have NEVER set eyes on the surface of the top shelf!)

neat & tidy pantry:

One thing that excited me and pissed me off (I reserve the right to feel both emotions simultaneously... so there) was this: See, a couple of weeks ago, Mr. RicRac and I decided to make the year's first batch of ice cream. For that, we needed vanilla beans. Have you priced these things lately? It would be cheaper to fly to Madagascar and harvest them yourself! At the market, we found two brands. One had 1 bean and cost $9.19!! The other contained 2 beans and cost $9.49! (We considered going to Trader Joe's, but it was late and we couldn't be guaranteed that Joe's would have them ... stupid us) Needless to say, we ponied up an extra 30 cents to get a second bean. And then I cleaned out the pantry and found this:

Another $20 or so of beans!! (and, of course, all from Joe's. Learned my lesson...)

And that brings me to the mayo (see, I told you there was mayo in this story). I decided last Saturday to make potato salad with the taters and eggs I'd bought at the farmer's market. Earlier in the day, the mayo in the fridge was about empty, so we grabbed a new jar out of the pantry. After I opened it, I had the moment of "Uhoh. Did I take a seal off of this? Did it have a seal? Are we gonna die?" The mayo looked fine, but there were a few tiny shards of blue plastic from the lid on the gooey spread. I picked them off, all smelled fine, and we took a chance. We lived--all limbs intact. And then I used it to make potato salad. Again, we lived. And then I woke up the next morning ... and found the pickles, mustard and mayo. OUT ON THE COUNTER! WHERE I'D LEFT IT ALL NIGHT!! sigh. Threw it all out and went to the store.

A word about the market closest to my house: It's icky. We don't go there unless we absolutely have to. And we only buy things that are hermetically sealed. (A friend calls it the "dirty baby kroger") I popped in, found the mayo, didn't even break stride picking it up, and went to the checkout. And paid over $5 for it. YES: FIVE DOLLARS!

Moral of the story: Clean out your pantry more often, and put things away!! Oh, and trust Trader Joe. He's your friend.

So now I've decided to try to make it myself. I'll let you know how that goes :)